When Your Soul Mate Doesn’t Feel the Same Way About You…
Is He Really Your Soul Mate?
A while back my friend emailed to tell me about her heartbreaking situation with a man she thought was her soul mate and asked me what my thoughts were…
She detailed that she had a relationship with a man that she felt was the one, her soul mate, and it had been going great for a while. She felt he was in love with her as much as she was with him. However, he was just coming off a messy divorce and he expressed he wasn’t ready for a deeper commitment at that time – so they parted ways. She believed she did the right thing by giving him time and waiting for him to come back when he was ready.
Long story short, he never did and is now in another relationship and engaged to be married.
As a woman who’s been in a similar situation let me just say first that I’m so sorry for the heartbreak you are going through. Myself and so many women I’ve known over the years have experienced similar circumstances. Please know your feelings are totally valid and just allow yourself to feel them whatever they may be.
Regardless of what you’re going through now you won’t need to feel this way for very long. There is a light at the end of this tunnel if you allow the situation to be a learning and growth experience.
Why would a soul mate leave?
Let me address the concept of Soul Mates. I mean, what is that anyway? There are so many definitions and thoughts on this ranging from you only get one – to – you have tons of them including your first grade teacher.
I can’t claim to really know for sure – but what I’ve noticed in my life and my feeling is that we have soul mates in two major categories: 1) The long term life journey growth and expansion kind, and 2) The short term, smack you in the face, wake you up so you get on the right path kind.
So with that in mind…yes, this man could have been your soul mate. But he was more likely a soul mate that helped you to re-direct on the right path so you can meet your long-term soul mate partner. I lovingly think of my last heartbreak (which I’m so grateful for) as my “wake up call guy.” Sounds like this guy was your wake up call guy.
Now let’s go back to the part about him not being sure about you.
The most important aspect to this I want to address here is the fact that he wasn’t sure about you and you still felt he was the one. This is not to judge you as I’ve been there, too, but this is an important part of the wake up process…
You must honestly ask yourself:
When all is said and done – as much as you may love someone if he doesn’t feel the same way about you is that good enough for you in your soul mate relationship?
Does that really cut it? Do you want to wake up every morning next to someone who had to really, really think about whether he wanted to be with you when you were positively sure about him?
Yes, you may be head over heels in love with him but nevertheless I sincerely hope you answered NO to those questions. If not then you may have some work to do around your limiting and very false beliefs about your worth in love and relationships.
Loves and feels the same way about you.
To love the one that loves you.
When you’re attracting deliberately you’re not just attracting any guy that feels you’re his maybe-when-he’s-ready – you’re attracting the one that is ready to drop everything and do anything to be with you and take vows with you at the altar and maybe even make little versions of the two of you.
That is your real soul mate.
Personally, after my wake up call guy I’ll be damned if I was going to settle for anything less than that ever again. And I don’t think any other woman should either.
So what do you need to do, believe or have to be open and ready to receive that kind of devoted love? What would it take for you know you have that kind of love waiting for you just around the corner?
This quote from Jeff Brown describes this perfectly:
“If one person doesn’t want the relationship, then it’s simply not a fit. No sense trying to figure out why we think they don’t want it. No sense blaming it on their commitment issues. No sense waiting around for them to realize they wanted it after all. And if they don’t want it, then we don’t want it, because we don’t want to be with someone who is not there for it fully. That’s the thing about a love relationship- it’s an agreement that has to be signed by both souls. If one doesn’t sign, then nothing has been lost. If it’s not a fit for them, it’s not a fit for us either.” Jeff Brown of Soul Shaping
If this at all resonates with you and you are done with “less than” love and ready for the one who wants to commit to you then get my free video lesson The 6 Practices of Women Who Find Their Soulmate right here!
Love & Light,