How Can You Tell If He’s the Real Deal?
If you’re reading this you probably have been there, done that, and are completely through dealing with players. Perhaps there is nothing more confusing and frustrating for women than the fact that men can say and do intimate things with a woman even if he doesn’t have intentions of getting into a long term relationship with her.
This was very frustrating for me, too, to say the least. When I woke up to this painful truth I completely changed the way I went into the dating process only to find it was a lot easier once I weeded out the guys that didn’t have serious intentions and were time, energy, and emotion wasters.
So here are the most important steps I took that helped me cut through the riff-raff and attract the right man:
1) Getting clear – I got clear about what I wanted in my life, my relationship, my man, and about how I wanted the dating process to go. It was no longer about what he wants, it was about what I want. This allowed me to approach dating grounded in who I am and very honestly.
Funny thing, the wishy-washy type guys weren’t so attracted to me then.
Get as clear as you possibly can about your desires before you date.
2) Being honest – whether it was on my online profile or with a guy in person I was very honest about what I wanted in my life. Without needing him to agree with me or feel the same way (after all we didn’t need to see each other again if we weren’t on the same page) – I was upfront that I wanted a serious relationship leading to marriage. Actually some guys told me they loved my honesty – even if that wasn’t what they wanted – before we said goodbye.
Be honest and be you. For example, if you don’t wish to have your conversations via text then kindly ask him to call you. If you don’t wish to be intimate with a man before you have a commitment then kindly tell him. A man that’s serious about you will honor you.
3) Took my sweet time before anything “more” – By just doing the first two steps I was pretty much only going on dates with men that were looking for a serious relationship. (The non-serious guys rarely got past the phone stage.) But even after I met my future husband, I took my sweet time getting to know him before jumping in physically and emotionally. Why? To see if his actions were in alignment with his words and that he follows through. To see how he treated others and myself. To see if he was in it for the long haul. To see if he made the effort to win my heart, not just my body.
Take as long as you need. The right man will honor that and demonstrate with his actions that he’s after your heart and not just your body. And the players? Well, they can be on their merry little way for all you care.
By following these three steps when you’re dating to meet your soul mate you’re acting and behaving in alignment with the real soul mate partnership that you’re attracting into your life. And you further affirm to the Universe that you will only accept the love and respect you deserve.
Want to know more about deliberately attracting your soul mate? If you liked this then you will enjoy my two audios, Six Ways To Begin Deliberately Attracting Your Soul Mate Now and Five Ways To Shift Into Love. Please sign up at the top of the page to download them for free!
Love & Gratitude,